Kill the Cook

You know the nightmare where you are at a hotel taking a shower have shampoo in your hair and are shaving your legs when the fire alarm goes off? Then you have to jump out of the shower wrap a towel around yourself and go outside in the cold in the middle of the night dripping with soap and shaving cream and wait for the firetruck to come? Yeah, that wasn't my nightmare, but my reality is that I have a wicked bad cold and had to get up at 5:30 am so I took cold medicine and went to bed early and Hoss was up til midnight studying and had just fallen asleep when the fire alarm went off at our extended stay hotel at 12:45am and we had to go out and wait in the hotel parking lot until 1:30am for the firemen to come and check every room all because someone was cooking a steak at 1 in the morning and set it on fire which resulted in smoke and set off the alarm!

Seriously, who cooks steak in the middle of the night? Who eats steak in the middle of the night? And who catches steak on fire when they are cooking on an electric stove?

We're expecting...

...to close on our new house in Denver before the 22nd of September!

After weeks of being residents of Wyorado, spending our weekdays in Denver hotels and weekends, yup you guessed it, at the Mil residence in Cheyenne (we just can't seem to get away from there...:), we are finally finally going to have a place to call our own.

Here is the newest addition to our family...

My favorite part is our luscious lawn! Well, at least the lawn part, I think maybe a little TLC will help with the luscious part. (Really my favorite part is the kitchen).

Why did we buy a house...

... when this is where Hoss spends most hours of his day and part of his night as a student going to class, studying, working in the lab making wax teeth, studying, assisting the 3rd & 4th year dental students, oh and studying...

University of Colorado School of Dental Medicine

....And this is where Rose spends most hours of her day as a speech pathologist working with elderly who have suffered a stroke or other neurological trauma... (In a perfect world I really want to work with little babies and toddlers, but my world isn't quite perfect yet, so hopefully that job is in my future.)

Briarwood Health Care Center

...Well, for my own sanity I can't stand living in a hotel anymore and mostly we needed somewhere to spend time together, so we figured what the heck, lets buy a house. We have plenty of room so this is an open invitation to come take advantage of having friends in Denver...but maybe not until October so we have a chance to move in first!

Local Olympian: Gold Medal Worthy?

My dad really loves the Olympics. I mean, really loves the Olympics. We're talking all Olympics, all the time. He loves them so much that he wanted to try his hand at an all new obscure Olympic sport, right up there with trampoline jumping (What?! When do you catch the dream of becoming the gold medalist in jumping on a trampoline?). We'll call this all new sport, ah, "How much weight will my ceiling support if I climb up in the attic and stand on it, between the studs!" or maybe "Man vs. Drywall". Kind of has a nice ring to it, don't ya think?

We missed the mount, and most of the routine, but here he is coming into the dismount. This takes incredible control and upper body strength.

Nice look at the judges, confidence or surprise at the "success" of the routine?
Not sure, but eye contact is always good.
Here he is demonstrating his
"I can dangle my entire body using only one arm for support"
move. Very difficult sequence.

After the dismount, gazing at a job well done.
Who won, the ceiling, or Dad?
At first glance, I would say definitely Dad.

At second glance, the great silver chest/back that is my Dad probably has more painful and longer lasting damage than the drywall.

In his post event interview Mr. Mil was quoted saying,
"I felt like Harry Potter traveling through the flue network. One second I was in the attic, and the next I was in the kitchen."


As the only competitor in this event, Dad was awarded the gold medal.
What a guy, an Olympian and a Grandpa too.

How do I know you?

Oh right, we used to take down drug lords together!

So Hoss & I were out shopping this afternoon and to say the least, we learned some interesting facts about meth. What did we learn you ask? Well, meth trafficking is ever increasing in Wyoming. We have larger quantites coming in less frequently around the state and smaller quantities coming into Cheytown, but more frequently. So who shared this information with us? Well, only Hoss's good friend, Bob Olive! Let me give you the play-by-play.

Man in his mid 40's stops Hoss in store aisle and says: Hey, hows it going?
Hoss: Good, how are you?
Man: Good, things are good.
Hoss: What are you doing these days?
Man: Oh, still prosecuting meth cases (glances at Rose).
Hoss: Oh yeah, is it getting to be more of a problem?
Man: (this is where we got our meth lesson).
Rose: Ah, I'm Rose by the way, Hoss's wife.
Man: Oh Hi, I'm Bob Olive.
Rose: Nice to meet you (shake hands), Hoss sometimes forgets to introduce me.
Man: Yeah, that's just a man thing (Why is that a man thing?).
Rose: (laugh laugh)
Man: (to Hoss) So what are you doing these days?
Hoss: Well, I actually started dental school this week down in Denver.
Man: Wow, no kidding.
Hoss: Yeah, we figured we would try it out and see how things go.
Man: Wow, from prosecuting meth cases to dental school. That is quite a career change.
Hoss: Uh-huh (What the heck is this guy talking about?)
Man: Well it was good to see you.
Hoss: You too.
Rose: Nice to meet you.
Man: Likewise.
Hoss: We'll talk to you later.
Man: Bye.
Hoss: Bye.

Hoss and Rose walk away.

Hoss: I didn't introduce you because I have no idea who that guy is.
Rose: (Can't stop laughing long enough to say anything)
Hoss: See, I can even fake being social!
Rose: (still laughing) You're sure you didn't used to be a lawyer?
Hoss: That is the worst case of mistaken identity I have ever had.

Can anyone picture Hoss in a courtroom, wearing a power suit, cross examining a drug dealer? I think I would rather him stick to putting in gold caps or diamonds studs on their front teeth. Lets leave the courtroom to Bob Olive.

Do you read your receipts?

Why do I shop at Wal-mart? Well because I am poor and Wal-mart is the best deal around.

Exhibit A: My receipt (my only exhibit)

This receipt is 16" long. I only bought 8 items, and believe it or not, this receipt is on the short side! Along with letting me know "We value your opinion" and giving me the opportunity to go online and complete a survey for the chance to win a $1000 shopping card, it also cautions that I must be 18 years or older to participate in the survey (totally unfair, if someone under 18 buys something at Wal-mart shouldn't they get the same opportunities as all of the customers 18 years or older?), as well as tells me that they carry "All you need for back to school, At our best-in-class prices". Oh, it also tells me in giant bold letters that I bought 8 items, in case I couldn't count. Only about 4 inches of this receipt contains information that I ever need to know again, and even then, most likely, probably never.

This waste of paper and marginally useless information has obviously bothered me for a while, so I did a little calculation. Wal-mart serves an average 138 million customers world wide per week. If every customer averages 8 items and a 16" receipt that is 2,208 million inches of paper. That translates into 34,848 miles of receipt paper per week. What does that mean? Well I am no math genius so my calculations are rough, but I figure that it is approximately 19,000 miles say from Denver, all the way around the world, and back to Denver. That means there is enough receipt paper put out by Wal-mart every week to wrap around the world almost twice! Nearly 100 times a year, and that doesn't account for the holidays. I confess I don't live as green as I could or should, but doesn't that translate into a lot of trees?

Wal-mart isn't the only offender, and call me crazy, but give us the option to not print a receipt, or at least cut out all of the useless information that my bet is no one every reads. And to the guy who does, he must be winning a lot of free shopping cards. Wish I were him.

PROS & CONS: Life in San Diego

2 days, 1200 miles, and a really long car ride later, we hail again from Wyoming...but only for a couple of weeks. Here is a bit about San Diego if you are considering moving there, or just want a great vacation.

CONS:
1. Our families are both 1200-ish miles away
2. Gas Prices: We paid $4.96 for gas, and when you commute a total of 56 miles a day, it is really hard on the bank account!
3. Traffic: if you live in San Diego get a job near your house, or a house near your job.
4. The police are too busy writing parking tickets to fight crime.

Case in point: I got a ticket at this location for parking facing downhill on a hill and not cramping my wheels. First of all, I think it is questionable how much of a "hill" I am parked on, and secondly, shouldn't laws like this be posted, and thirdly, what the heck does "cramping" mean? I thought cramping was a blessed feeling only for those of the female gender, but apparently, it actually means to turn your wheels towards the curb. Somehow I don't think Midol is going to help me out of this $48 ticket!

PROS:
1. The Weather-between 65 and 80 degrees all of the time! Who wouldn't love that?
2. The Beach
3. Seaworld
4. The FRESH fruit!
5. Hoss's green thumb

Hoss planted these tomato plants and thanks to the fabulous sunshine and his talent there were many tiny green tomatoes sprouting when we left. He also grew a zucchini plant, basil, and saved the lemon thyme from the brink of death, along with most of the in-house greenery.

6. Breakfast Burritos from Albertacos
7. Shopping
8. Avacados!
9. Anything from Rubios
10. The San Diego Temple

11. Gordita shells made right there in San Diego and stocked at the local Costco
12. Spanish immersion
13. Pretty much all of the Mexican food
14. Legoland

I tried to battle Darth Vader, but it was too scary for me, so I passed my light saber off to Super Hoss. He had to pull some fancy footwork, but we both walked away from it, so I think we can call it a win-maybe because DV is made completely out of Lego.

15. The Hoopes

The best reason to live in San Diego. We gotta love 'em cause their family, but we really love 'em. We basically lived in a 5 star bed & breakfast with a 5 star chef for 3 months. We had great conversation, hours in the jacuzzi, and loads of fun. We really miss them.

The Hoopes- Mig, Uncle T and Big T

Yup, the pros definitely outweigh the cons. Now I just have to convince Hoss...

Bargain Shopper Imposter

I freely and proudly admit to being a bargain shopper. Ross, TJ-Maxx, Marshalls, Nordstrom Rack, etc. If you can buy a shirt for $10, name that store and I am there. In fact, I stock my wardrobe with items from these stores so much, that when I actually go to a department store or the mall I am appalled at the inflated prices! Given my innumerable visits to said stores, I feel that I can say with some conviction that to be a bargain shopper, you must possess certain qualities.

1. Patience-sometimes you really have to search for the good stuff and sometimes you have to wait a while in the check out line.

2. Time-it is almost impossible to go to one of these stores for a quick look around, and sometimes you have to wait a while in the check out line.

3. Understanding- expect average to below average customer service, not because the staff is incompetent, but these people are getting minimum wage, it doesn't pay for them to kiss up to the customers, so sometimes you have to wait a while in the check out line.

4. Limited Funds (not necessary in all cases, I hope to always be a bargain shopper and always be appalled at the price of clothing at stores in the mall).

With my expert sleuthing skills, I believe I discovered an impostor on my most recent visit to Marshalls. Believe it or not, I actually did stop for a quick look around with my primary objective being to return some apparel (a difficult to avoid trap in the mind of the bargain shopper...I don't love it, but I like it okay, and it is only $8 bucks, so I will get it anyway...I could be wearing designer jeans with the money I have spent on $8 clothes over the years! But, I have turned over a new leaf recently, if I don't wear it within two weeks, I have to return it, but that is a whole other post...back to the impostor). After about 20 minutes of browsing I decided I would rather go home, so I headed to the checkout line with my returns. Tic-toc, 10 minutes go by. A 7-ish year old boy is skating around on his roller shoes and the checker asks his mother to contain her child for the duration of their time in Marshalls. There were only two checkers, one with an Italian woman and some resulting language confusion, and the other with a little lady who had a lot of baby clothes to check out. Tic-toc, another 10 minutes. I wasn't really in a hurry, and there was a whole rack of purses in front of me, and I was oddly satisfied when I identified a leather Coach bag before I even picked it up. Time for my visual.

All of a sudden, behind me a bit, the 7-ish boy forgets that he isn't supposed to be rolling in his roller shoes in the store. So his mother, right in front of me, chucks her shoe box and stationery kit over Impulse Buy Aisle #1 at the check out counter (Appropriate response?). Turns to leave, and shoves by me (Um, excuse me, sorry I am standing here?) Brushes by the woman behind me, then turns back to her son and says loudly,

Mom: "Offspring, get over here!"

Offspring: "Mom, what are you doing?"

Mom: "We're leaving"

Offspring: "Why did you..."

Mom: "If they didn't take so darn long..."

She then rushed out of the store practically without her son, and left the rest of us kind of stunned. Did a grown woman really just chuck her purchases at the check-out counter? Yup, she did. So what was wrong with this woman? Was she posing as a bargain shopper? Did she lack patience, time, and understanding? If nothing else, I think it is safe to say that she didn't love the shoes, they were just "okay", and definitely not worth waiting around for.

In her defense, there is always a story you don't know. Maybe she really wanted some designer jeans.